So I've reached the point in my half-marathon training where I've got a good base run going, and am now starting to do one LSD run (which, I'm told, stands for "Long Slow Distance," but still makes me think of psychedelic visions) each week. That means I'm cutting back my training to three somewhat easy runs of just 3 miles or so each week, and one successively longer run on the weekend.

Did my latest long run yesterday, a full five miles, and it felt great. Purposely made myself go slower than I thought I should, and that paid off: by the end of the run, I felt as if I could run another mile or two (but resisted the temptation--I'm trying to go about this the right way).

In an odd way, I've come to enjoy this whole running gig, which really is 180 degrees from my feelings before. I like the time spent alone, the physical exertion, the immediate improvement in my mood when I finish the run.

Training has gone through a few hiccups in the last few months. I already recounted the thyroid adventures; we're still working on the correct dosage. I'm currently on 100 mcg per day, but that still doesn't have me down to the "controlled" level (although my TSH level has dropped considerably); in about two weeks, we'll check levels again and possibly bump up the dosage a bit if the level hasn't continued to drop.

About two weeks ago, I also began tapering off my beta blocker (labetalol) after doing some research into my lack of endurance and talking with my doctor. Did you know a beta blocker can hammer your endurance because it shuts down your body's production of adrenaline? So when you're running, for instance, and your heart asks for some adrenaline to keep the blood oxygenated, the labetalol interrupts that process? Well, I didn't know either, until doing a bit of research. Started tapering off the beta blocker and switching to a calcium channel blocker two weeks ago, and noticed an immediate improvement in my endurance and running.

The bad news is, I haven't really dropped any weight in the last several months still. I'm within five pounds of where I was last...mmm...September--even though with my running program I'm burning about an extra 3000-4000 calories every week. I attribute it to the underactive thyroid, and my suspicion that I'm still not at the perfect dosage level. Maybe even a bit attributable to the beta blocker interfering with workouts. So I'll keep monitoring over the next month and see what happens. If I don't start dropping weight again after the thyroid's in check and the beta blocker is totally out of my system...well, we'll burn that bridge when we cross it.

Until then, I'm not getting too stressed about the weight. As I wrote before, I look at this as a bit of a challenge with my body; each time it complains and says it's not built to run long distances, I run some more. Sooner or later, the body's going to have to give up the complaining and just drop weight to make those runs easier. I'll win that argument, one way or the other.

I've begun keeping a bit better track of what I eat, too--not 100% compliant, but even if I'm missing 20% of my calories (which I certainly am not), I'm not at outrageous calorie levels. Generally about 2500 a day, and I don't want to drop a lot farther than that while I'm starting to push longer and longer runs.

So, if you see a big guy running down the street while gnawing on a pork rib, that's probably me. (The runner, not the pork rib.)

I'm thinking I may--operative word "may"--sign up for the local Shamrock 5K here in Billings in mid-March. Make it my first race, get some jitters out of the way. After that, it's on to Spokane for Bloomsday Run in May (May 2nd), and then...well, who knows? As it is, I'm angling for a half-marathon in the Montana Marathon in September. But I'm almost wondering about pushing for a half-marathon in June (both Polson and Great Falls have half-marathons that would be good candidates), then assessing where I'm at and where I want to go. I might try to do a second half-marathon at the Montana Marathon in September, or if I feel really stupid, I might actually push to train for a full Marathon. If all goes well, I'll have a half-marathon under my belt and about 14 weeks to train for a full.

But we'll burn that bridge when we cross it, too. I might get 100 yards into my first race and decide it's time to start running with pork ribs again.

In an odd way, I think the running has been an outward expression of the changes I went through during the cancer experience. Never before would I have thought of running a half-marathon, or running anywhere except to the refrigerator. And you know what? I'd likely still be more than 300 pounds, stuck on the couch while taking a beta blocker that kept me from long workouts, and well on my way to some serious heart disease.

As it is now, I'm well on the way to getting in the best shape of my life (still got a ways to go--although I've never, never been able to run as far as I'm running now). And I have cancer to thank for it. I like to think that's part of the reason why I've gone through this whole thing: to make me more aware of my own body, and my own health. In that way, cancer has changed my life in positive ways.

The other side of that, I have to honestly admit, might be a dangerous bit of bargaining with God: if I keep running, and keep improving my health, I'm making positive changes in my life. And if I"m making positive changes in my life, God will prevent a relapse. That reasoning doesn't hold water, I know, but in my heart of hearts, I do feel it's part of my motivation. I feel part of me is trying to outrun cancer as much as anything.

Still, realistically, even when/if I do have a relapse...the better health I'm in, the better off I'll be. So let's look at the whole program as proactive, preventive treatment.

Maybe I should put down the pork ribs.