Today, whilst driving home for lunch, I listened to "To the Point," an NPR news/talk program devoted to issues of the day. The topic du jour was the inadequacy of our current primary/caucus schedule, and one of host Warren Olney's guests was Mary Kiffmeyer, Minnesota's Secretary of State and President of the Association of Secretaries of State. As I drove, I realized what an unfortunate acronym the Association of Secretaries of State creates. Upon further reflection, I decided--the organization being an group of officials charged with overseeing political campaigns in all 50 U.S. states--it might nevertheless be somewhat fitting. And consider the possibilities for promotion; why, the mind fairly boggles when thinking of catchy tag lines.

If they wanted to educate members about where they are and what they do, they could send materials asking: "Do you know where your A.S.S. is?" How about recruitment of officers and leaders? Simply ask members: "Would you sit on your A.S.S.?" Perhaps a fundraiser could be launched under the battle cry of "Cover your A.S.S." And if Ms. Kiffmeyer ever resigns, they could begin the search for a new president by telling everyone "We need a head in our A.S.S."

Alas, the A.S.S. folks obviously felt this acronym would be a problem, and so added an unnecessary word to their name (and web site) to avoid unfortunate connotations: they want to be known as the National Association of Secretaries of State.

They can call themselves whatever they want. But in my mind, they'll never quite kick A.S.S.